This post kind of sucks but I haven't written in awhile so there ya go

I don't really know how to get into it right now.

The more I think about it, the more restless I get about my life right now. It seems to me that senior year only exists to "get it done" because SOMETHING has to end the labyrinth that is gradeschool. Living just to get it out of the way, get it over with, seems like an awful waste of time to me, but I do realize that it IS up to me to change my life if I feel that this is how it's going.

Obviously I would hate myself eternally if I dropped out of school and obviously I'm in no way actually considering it, but it does cross my mind. Other insane ideas I've had have been:
1. Do ROTC, get free tuition
2. Take a year off and go help the Africans with their African problems, or the South Americans with their South American problems or whatever
3. Take my whole life off and go help the Africans with their African problems, or the South Americans with their South American problems or whatever
4. Go to U of Michigan and have my entire life work out exactly the way I want it to
5. Living in a Bungalo on a black sand beach somewhere. Anywhere really.
6. Hawaii.

I wish I could describe to you the frustration I'm having with everything lately but I can't seem to grasp it and put it into words right now but I tried. I wrote a bitchin essay in Spanish today, may I say. I'm so damn smart.