Classic.

Well hello there blog.  Great news!  I have been taking note of things that I hate lately just so that I could write a post about them and, while my original plan was to do this for far longer than 1 week, I just hate all of these things so much that I can't even wait to tell you.

And a small disclaimer, as I have said in the past, most of the things I complain about are entirely ridiculous things and I could definitely be spending my time in more constructive ways but still, I had a crap weekend and I find this to be cathartic.

In order of when I noticed them:
1.  That shit cliche in books and movies in which a brunette female has a job working for a high-end fashion magazine but still claims that she wants to be a "REAL writer."  What exactly defines being a REAL writer?  Writing about something that "matters"? my ass.

2.  That shit cliche in movies (mainly, but sometimes books) in which the protagonist is rude to everybody because her life is far too busy and she is far too important to give people the time of day, yet EVERYONE is nice to her anyway and sympathizes with her struggle against the man anyways.  If a real woman were half as rude as most female protagonists in romantic comedies, she would not get laid ever and everyone knows it.

3.  When people rhyme passion with fashion.  Come up with something new DAMN

4.  When people (ahem, Luke Blazevic*, in math class, every damn day) say "flip flop" instead of saying switch or replace or something that makes any sense at all

5.  When math teachers tell you to plug and chug.  And, if you do not attend Westlake High School, that phrase probably means nothing to you because what the hell does it mean anyway?  How does the word "chug" make sense in that context? Huh?

6.  In a very George Orwell kind of a way, I hate when people use unclear wording and non sequitur-ish terms to describe serious things.  Or not serious things, but especially when it's serious.  A lame and unserious example would be instead of answering the question of Where is Karen? with Karen went to the supermarket, an ass who doesn't want you to know exactly what Karen is up to might say:  Karen is not at home.  While the second statement is just as true as the first, it is unspecific and does not at all answer the question.  And it pisses me the hell fucking off.**

7. The phrase "i would never kiss someone who smokes- it would taste like an ashtray!"  Honestly- when licking an ashtray, my first concern would not be the taste but rather the germs from trillions of little ashes sitting on there for probably months and the texture of those ashes.  Blech.  All I'm saying is that the taste of an ashtray is not the gross part about licking an ashtray.


*yeah I'm naming names.
**If this is the type of business-adult-speak I have to look forward to, I want no damn part of it.  Ever.